When I was a teenager, my father would always tell me to slow down, to find balance in my activities. Because, I am one of these people that, once I start something for which I have motivation, go all in. I get consumed by it all. As a teenager, it could be a new boyfriend, a new movie which I loved (Titanic at 15? I watched it more than socially acceptable, and of course, got fed up in a couple of weeks. Now, I can't stand the soundtrack).
I think I went into the weight loss journey a little like that. I can spend long periods of time planning my meals, reading blogs for inspiration, trying to plan where in my day will I be able to fit in a workout. I'm afraid I will get tired of it. Go back to my old ways. This week, I longed for some time, quietly sitting reading a book, or in a cafe, working on my laptop. I felt like I did not have time to do that because I had to work out, or attend an evening meeting for my orchestra, or whatever. Today, despite the fact that I finished work early and did not have to meet my brother for dinner until 6pm, I decided not to workout. For my own sanity. I'm having a cup of tea while working on meeting reports for the orchestra (and maybe blogging a little too).

Love those earrings!

But on the other hand, I'm afraid that this means I'm slacking off. That it is my first step backwards. When I read other bloggers, they seem to be working out every single day! How can they fit that in their schedule? This baffles me. I'm trying to do a proper work out 3 times a week, and maybe a little yoga at home in between (but I'll admit yoga hasn't been a regular activity for a couple of weeks) and I could fit in a fourth. But that would mean dropping social activities, or giving up my responsibilities on the orchestra's Board. These are things I like and enjoy. Right now, I'm ok with working out, but I don't enjoy it (frankly, it can be hell). Maybe that means I'm not giving it a 100%. Maybe. I'm trying to convince myself I just need to find the proper balance for ME. Where I loose weight, get healthy in my body without loosing the health in my mind and relationships.